my baby shot me down

you know how you can see patterns in things (like faces in clouds). i could very clearly see the word "cops" spelled out on my towel last night. and i saw a robber in a water splash in my shower today. these are more like daydreams.

my heart for you

i had a dream that i was in a horror film about cooking. it was called Chop Chef and it was terrifying.

el zygote

i dreamed my brother came home from his mission and we were only sort of excited he was back. emily clifford wrote the most incredible blogpost about single cell organisms that referenced all these simpsons clips that dont actually exist but were really funny. and my sister was running away with a boy who had terrible facial hair. my newly returned brother and i had to track them down and kept asking everyone we saw if they'd seen a guy with a face beard and they would all say no no no and shoo us away with their hands. every single one of them.

you are not yet as job

i ordered myself new business cards in my dream and they came back printed on slices of ham and i was like what am i supposed to do with these?

I had a dream last night that the Girl Talk guy was at my apartment and wanted to throw a party. Only it wasn't my apartment but rather, the basement of a house. And all of the sudden A TON of people came in, there were people sitting everywhere, on everything. Then out of the blue my elderly landlords, Dick and Jean, came in and said everyone needed to sign waivers in order for the party to go on. But the waiver was like 4 pages long with all sorts of conditions and explanations. But I thought that was pretty impressive because I assumed all of their stipulations meant they had thrown lots of parties and had a lot of experience with them getting out of control. And then everyone signed the waivers so that wasn't so bad. But then Girl Talk guy wanted to watch a movie (I don't remember which one), so he turned on a movie. And people started to leave. And by the time it was over, pretty much everyone was gone. So there wasn't really a party after all.

A Gentle Rub

I had a dream that Sayid from LOST was giving me a back massage. But I kept getting annoyed because he was too gentle.

moderately priced pornography

i dreamed i was supposed to be in a porn with anton chigur. the anticipation was the worst part.